Who Cares if I Worship the Devil?

Nobody wants anything I’ve got, which if fine because you’re made of everything I’m not. If you’re 555 then I’m 666. ~ Slipknot

I had a blind date last night with a guy whom I will call "Steve." Steve was described to me as being 6'1" (good...I'm not very tall, but I like to wear HIGH heels, so a tall guy is a good thing) with sandy blonde hair, bright blue eyes, and a huge, infectious smile complete with dimples (I LOVE dimples!) Sounds nice enough. But that was just his appearance. When the description got in to Steve's substance, it lost its glow a bit for me. Even though he was only 27 (a tad bit younger than me), I was told that the things he enjoyed most were tennis, chess, classical music, black and white movies and foreign films, and theater. Now, I'm not knocking any of these things -- I like all of them, too. However, to list them as your FAVORITE things? Is he 27 or 87? And could he be any more PREPPY?

So I'll be honest that I was a little skeptical about Steve heading in to the date.

Anyway, we met at a little tapas place downtown. I was, of course, running a little bit late, so when I arrived, he was already seated and had ordered himself a glass of wine. I spotted him from afar and thought, "hmm...not bad." He looked pretty attractive -- he was wearing a suit and I'm a sucker for a man in a suit. I headed over to the table and he stood up upon my approach. He was tall! Woohoo! But, as I got closer, he started to smile...revealing what had to have been the pointiest teeth I've ever seen. Seriously.

Have you ever seen the movie version of Stephen King's "IT"? Know Pennywise -- the clown? Yikes! I actually audibly gasped when I saw those choppers...each one...EACH one coming to a crisp, sharp point. Holy crap.

As we sat down, I did so carefully...one wrong move and he could seriously bite my arm off.

After I ordered a sangria and had a few sips while carefully trying (but failing miserably) to not stare aghast at the fangs of death, we started to chat. I learned that Steve was from a small town in Ohio that wasn't far from where I grew up, which gave us something to talk about (always a bonus). Steve was actually a lawyer for the Department of Homeland Security, so had a potentially interesting job...that he couldn't really talk about...except to complain about his boss. So I listened to that for a bit before steering the conversation towards one of my favorite topics...music.

I asked Steve if he was a music fan and his eyes lit up and he said YES! and began talking about the classical music society that he belonged to and some of the recent concerts the group had attended. Now, I like classical music -- it's not my FAVORITE, but I appreciate it and actually own my fair share and listen to it often. Plus, I always appreciate someone who is passionate about music, so as I listened to him go on and on about Bach and Beethoven, my fixation on his teeth began to fade and I started to think that maybe Steve wasn't such a bad guy. Then he asked me what kinds of music I listened to...and I answered.

I started off subtle and vague with my response -- "I like pretty much everything but rap." Then I started to drill down and reveal that at my core, I like heavy, hard rock. My favorites include bands such as Tool, Alice in Chains, Metallica, My Bloody Valentine, Rage Against the Machine, Slipknot, yadda yadda. As I rattled off MY favorites, his face started to pale. Odd. Then he said, in a very calm voice, "You really listen to that stuff?" And I enthusiastically replied YES! and continued naming bands such as Walls of Jericho, As I Lay Dying, Nine Inch Nails. He got a little paler and said, "That music is the devil's music. I can't date someone who worships the devil."

Umm...

I chugged what was left of my sangria and got up to leave, explaining that while that it was great meeting him, I was sorry, I had to run if I wanted to catch this evening's séance...I didn't want to be late because it was my turn to draw the pentagram on the floor in the virgin's blood.

Now, isn't dating just a hoot?